Just before the said time

It has been a very long time since my last entry. Not only on this blog, but my suppose daily diary lagged behind as well.

All of the preparations for the wedding make me edgy. So badly. It puzzles me. Because I did not have this uneasy feeling since the beginning of it all. Which puzzled me as well. Because I used to think "why didn't I feel nervous at all?". It is kind of disturbing because this edginess comes only two weeks away from the said time. It seems like I owe an apology to Mama for being irritated at her urges to me to get everything done earlier. Hehe.. Sorry Mama..

On the other hand, I also do feel gaiety. After years of quest for love, I finally met him. The one that has been there all along. The happiness I feel seems too close to perfect it fades my worries away. It also irritated me because the said man seems to not feel like it. I guess the gaiety of being married must not be shown in public. Typical machismo. But, whatever. My happiness is at the highest degree one could possibly imagine. Nothing could touch it. All praise to Allah.

Eldest

A chaotic plan would be an understatement of last Saturday's event. As Abah and Mama succumbed to our elders' 'proper' plan (as they termed it), I gave in. At that point of time I guessed, being the eldest of their grandchildren had certainly brought more disadvantages than privileges.

Nevertheless, his family has been kind enough to bear with the inconveniences and I am thoroughly grateful to them. My aunts and uncles lended their hands until the end of the ceremony and I just cant be thankful enough. All in all, I was overcome with a mixture of relief and gratitude.